- Паап... - я налил себе чая и...

“Paap ...” I poured myself some tea and sat down opposite.
   - As?
   - I have a vacation.
   - Congratulations heartily.
   - Uh ... - I hesitated, I do not like to ask for money, - what do you think, if I invite a girl to the movies, then the financial well-being of our family will not be greatly shaken?
   Dad mockingly raises his eyebrows:
   - How complicated you are ... I don’t even immediately realize what you are hinting at. And in the end, the crown of creation, the magic word is “shaken” to completely confuse and disorient me.
   I smile back:
   - Well, I can’t come and immediately give a ruble to my forehead.
   - Wow, a whole ruble? Well, how many girls can be brought to the cinema ... - Dad dreamily rolled his eyes to the ceiling and began to count something, - five pieces!
   - Did you put the ice cream in the calculation before the session? - I specify busily. - Donuts with coffee after ... Plus a contingency reserve.
   “Oh, that’s not just about the movie ... It’s a planned siege,” Dad rubs his palms with interest, “from the classroom?”
   - Yeah.
   - On, there are two and a half, for the holidays. Enough?
   “Thank you, with a margin,” I relieved took a handful of silver in my palm and headed for my room.
   “Yes, by the way, remember,” flew into my back, “men, at least most of them, are arranged in such a way that they do not understand hints and non-verbal signals.” Non-verbal signals are ...
   I paused in the doorway.
   - I know what is it.
   Dad looks at me a little in surprise, nods slightly, and continues:
   - Well ... If you want to achieve something from a man, then speak directly and justify logically. But women are perfectly able to express themselves in hints and gestures. Because of this, by the way, quarrels often occur in families. It seems to the wife that she made clear what she expects from her husband, and the husband simply did not hear this request.
   I return to the chair and am curiously attaching myself to the armrest.
   - Funny ... And also?
   - What else?
   “And what are the differences between us here,” I tapped my temple with my finger.
   “More ...” - Dad thought for a moment, “more women are able to simultaneously control several tasks, while men are better able to concentrate on one.”
   "Multi-threaded and single-threaded systems," I translate for myself.
   “Therefore, there are so few women among high-class scientists or high-level chess players,” my father concludes, “they simply cannot biologically compete with men where a high concentration of attention on one problem is required. But they easily bypass us when building relationships, which is also important.
   - Maybe more important ...
   “Maybe ...” Dad agrees, lighting his pipe.
   A crucial moment, I fall silent for a while, watching the priesthood. Two minutes of struggle, four matches - and papa blissfully leaned back in his chair, watching the cloud expanding above him.
   - And also?
   Dad cheerfully cheered:
   “You are seriously preparing for battle.” Do not be afraid, everything is not so scary.
   - Yes, I’m not afraid ... Almost, - I smile, - just interesting. Well we really, not only look different, but work differently, but they don’t write about it anywhere.
   - Well, well ... - Dad grins mockingly and continues, - and we also have a different memory for actions. In men, this type of memory is noticeably shorter, so women seem vindictive to us. In fact - just more memorable than us.
   A stream of smoke, dodging, reached out to me, and I with pleasure draw in a sweet aroma.
   “But, don’t think about it,” my dad notes my movement, “if I notice, you’ll be a shit.” Or a drat? Hmm ... In general, it will not seem enough.
   “No, I'm not going to,” I answer sincerely, “and yet?”
   - And the assessment of actions is different, for women it is qualitative, for men it is quantitative. Women put plus or minus for the act, no matter what you did - bought her a huge bouquet of roses or helped put on a coat. There will still be only one plus. We scale the assessment of actions ... There is such an expression - “female bitchiness”. This is when, against the background of complete, as it seems to us, well-being in a relationship, we suddenly get an awl in the ass. And we are not aware that there is a reason - she has our balance of actions gone into the negative zone. And we are firmly convinced that in a solid plus. It's all about different evaluation methods and different memory lengths. Short stack with quantitative versus long stack with qualitative.
   Dad puffed thoughtfully and affirmatively said:
   “What is a stack, you know?”
   - Yeah. In "Science and Life" was ... - I say at random.
   Dad nodded and continued in a lecturer tone:
   - Well, and one more our typical mistake: it seems to us that having bought a huge bouquet, we ourselves earned indulgence for a long time. Mistake, sir, only one plus sign. Therefore, the best tactic for recruiting balls is often to add small finishes. What women call “attention,” and what we don’t like so much.
 But it converges, damn it! "I almost didn’t tell you this before."
   - Yes, they are aliens ... - I exclaim confusedly, - another species. So many differences!
  
 (from)