Искал подарок своей жене на 15-летие свадьбы. Интересная...

I was looking for a gift for my wife on the 15th wedding anniversary. An interesting thing was discovered in a store selling protective equipment. The thing that I liked was a pocket electric shocker for 100,000 volts. The product description said that the shocker delivers only a short-term paralyzing effect on the attacker, without long-term serious consequences, which gives you enough time to run away or call for help. What a defenseless woman needs. I bought a shocker and brought it home, charged two small batteries into it and pressed the button, having previously brought the shocker to a metal surface. Blue electric arcs ran around the contacts. COOL! Just now you have to explain to your wife where this black spot on the microwave comes from. Further more. I sat at home alone with a new toy and thought, well, what harm can two small batteries do? After all, an attacking person is far from a microwave! Comfortably sitting in a chair, reading the instructions, I glanced at our cat Kuzyu, who (a trusting soul) was lying nearby. I thought that it would be nice to test the toy on a live target. I must admit, the thought * to kick Kuzyu flashed through my head, but I found it inhumane and did not spoil the relationship with the cat. Nevertheless, the fact that my wife may have to defend herself with this contraption against a real criminal element required practical confirmation that the shocker would work in. Sitting in a chair in shorts and a T-shirt, holding a shocker in my hand, I read the instructions. It said that a one-second discharge would shock an attacker and put him at a loss, a two-second shock should cause muscle spasm and loss of control over the body, a three-second shock should throw the attacker to the ground, jerking like a gopnik dancing break, shock for more than 3 seconds would be an unnecessary waste batteries! Looking at this device, I thought: Thinking that such a device could not do much harm, I brought it to my leg. The cat Kuzya looked at me with interest, in his eyes it read:. But who is listening to the cat? And I pressed the button, hoping to give myself a discharge in less than a second, just to test the device. What happened then is difficult to describe, but I will try. I was sure that the CCM at least boxing, wrestling, and hand-to-hand fighting ran into my house, lifted me up in the air and * hit the floor. A couple of times - that's for sure. I vaguely remember how I woke up crouched on the floor with tears in my eyes and snot on my face, in a cold sweat, with my left hand in an abnormal position under my body and a strange stitching sensation in my legs. The cat stood above me, making sounds that I had not heard from him before. He licked my face and clearly wanted to say. Note: If you want to * kick yourself with a shocker, half a second will not work. The shock will continue until you * hit the floor, whereby knocking the shocker out of your hand. After a few minutes (I could only guess about the time, since it is relative at that moment) I forced myself to sit on a chair and examined the room. My glasses, which were on my nose, somehow ended up on the other side of the room, pricked in my arms and legs, and a decent numbness with very heavy weight in my lower lip was felt on my face. My wife really liked the gift and she often scares them with it.