Урок 1: Муж заходит в душ, в то...

Lesson 1: A husband goes into the shower while his wife has just finished bathing.
The doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and
running to open. At the doorstep is neighbor Bob. Just seeing her, Bob says:
"I will give you $ 800 if you take off the towel." Thinking a couple
seconds, a woman does this and stands in front of Bob naked. Bob gives her 800
dollars and leaves. The wife puts the towel back on and returns to
the bathroom. <Who was that?> The husband asks. <Bob, neighbor>, -
answers the wife. “Fine,” says the husband, “he didn’t say anything about 800
dollars that I owe? "
Moral of the story: share information on loans issued with shareholders,
otherwise you may be in an unpleasant situation.
Lesson 2: The priest suggests the nun give her a lift. Once in the car, she
crosses his legs, so that the thigh is exposed. Hard work for the priest
manages to avoid an accident. Aligning the car, he sneaks a hand on her
leg. The nun says: "Father, do you remember Psalm 129?" Priest cleans up
a hand. But, changing the gear, he again puts his hand on her leg. Nun
repeats: "Father, do you remember Psalm 129?" The priest apologizes:
"Sorry, sister, but the flesh is weak." Reaching the monastery, nun
sighs heavily and leaves. Arriving at the church, the priest finds a Psalm
129. It says: "Go on and look, above you will find happiness."
The moral of the story: if you do not know your job well, there are many opportunities for
development will take place right in front of you.
Lesson 3: Sales representative, secretary and manager go to dinner and
find an antique lamp. They rub her and Jin emerges from her. is he
says: "I will fulfill one desire of each of you." "I am the first, I
the first one! ”says the secretary.“ I want to be in the Bahamas now, in
boat, and not think about anything. "Pshsh! She disappears." Now I, now I, "-
says sales representative. "I want to be in Hawaii, relax on
beach, with massage, endless supply of pin colada and the love of all my
life. "Pshh! It disappears." Now it's your turn, "says Gene
to the manager. "I want those two to return to the office after lunch."
The moral of the story: always let your boss speak first.
Lesson 4: The eagle was sitting on a tree, resting and doing nothing. Little
the rabbit saw an eagle and asked: "Can I sit like you, too, and nothing
not to do? "" Of course, why not, "he answered. The rabbit sat under
tree and began to rest. Suddenly a fox appeared, grabbed a rabbit and ate
his. The moral of the story: to sit and do nothing, you must sit very, very high.
Lesson 5: The turkey spoke to the bull. "I dream to climb to the top of the tree,
she sighed, “but I have so little strength.” “Why don't you bite
my litter? - answered the bull, - it has a lot of nutrients. "Turkey
pecking a bunch of litter, and it really gave her enough strength to
to climb the bottom branch of a tree. The next day, eating more, she
reached the second branch. Finally, on the fourth day, the turkey proudly sat
on top of a tree. There, a farmer noticed her and shot down with a shot from a gun.
Moral of the story: shit manipulation can help you climb on
top but won't hold you there.
Lesson 6: A small bird flew south to winter. It was like this
it’s cold that she froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While she is there
lay, the cow passed by and gawked at her. Lying in a cow’s flat cake
the bird suddenly realized how warm she was. Cow shit brought her back to life!
The bird suddenly felt so good that she sang to express her
joy. A cat running past heard singing and decided to figure out
what's the matter. Following the source of the sound, the cat found a bird, unearthed it
and ate.
The moral of the story:
1) not everyone who has blasphemed you, your enemy.
2) not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
3) if you are deep in shit, it is best to keep your mouth shut.